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Nwaami

Centering the African Female

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Tag: emotional abuse

I’m Not That Guy

I’m Not That Guy: “The guy that hits? Thats not me.”

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Emotional labor: We were in the living room with a guest. Our 9 month old daughter was playing with crayons and I had to go attend to something, leaving the baby with my husband. As I walked back into the room, I overheard my husband’s guest point out to him that our daughter was about to put a crayon in her mouth. However, my husband casually glanced up and replied “I’m sure my wife checked if the crayons were toxic before buying them so they are probably safe”. He did not bother to get up to check himself, or stop the baby from putting the crayons in her mouth. Some might see that as a compliment from my husband; a testament to how competent and detail oriented he feels his wife is. What you fail to address though, is that it is also completely lazy and irresponsible parenting; emblematic of a relationship where the burden of emotional labor is one-sided.⁠

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